Review Thursday: Singapore Stinger III Paddle

A few weeks ago, the Masterly type made an order with Pink Cherry.  Attention Canadians: this website actually has reasonably priced adult toys.  Their bdsm and bondage selection is slim, compared with some US sites, but you don't have to worry about customs and brokerage fees, outrageous shipping or long delays in getting your order.  The package arrived exactly when they said it would (about a week after placing the order online) in perfect condition, nice plain packaging, packed well and with everything exactly as we'd ordered it, plus a little thank you packet with some lube samples inside.

One of the items we bought was a little bamboo paddle produced by Pipedream called the Singapore Stinger III, which retails for $11.99 CAD on their website.  We've seen it for much less in the US, but adding shipping makes it twice as much.  It looked lightweight and simple, and like the kind of thing most people buy as a starter toy, so we thought it would work well for a review. At 11" long and 4" wide it's small enough for even the tiniest female to handle easily.  Unfortunately, that means that the Masterly one's hands kind of dwarfed the thing, but that's nothing new.

For me, this did not deliver the kind of spanking I'm generally looking for.  I'm not sure if it was the circumstances or the paddle itself, but afterwards I was left feeling cranky and kind of angry instead of reaching that blissful release I usually arrive at somewhere in the middle of impact play.  I think that the Masterly one was having trouble with the use of the paddle itself, because the blows seemed to be inconsistent and out of rhythm, which is unusual for him.  It might have been me getting an attitude too, because toward the beginning of the spanking there were a couple smacks to my bare calves.

Now, we don't do limits or safe words, but that nearly inspired some creative thinking to figure out how to introduce one in the middle of a session.  The backs of my knees and the backs of my calves are so very, very sensitive.  They, along with the insides of my elbows, the small of my back, and the back of my neck are some of my most easily arousable erogenous zones.  They also, as a general rule, do not respond well to pain.  So I started off a bit on the wrong foot, so to speak.

As to the blows itself, there is something about the size and shape of this paddle that just doesn't do it.  It's too large to have the stingy, bendy thwacky hit that a wooden spoon or spatula has.  It's too small to have the proper thud of impact that a paddle has.  It's somewhere in between.

Halfway through the spanking, the kind of warm up I usually get started.  If we'd started there, I might have had a different experience, because this is where the paddle seemed most effective.  When you can get into a consistent rhythm with blows that are also consistent in speed and force of impact, it's actually pretty nice.  I started to relax and enjoy myself.  I felt myself warming up, my muscles letting go, and my body getting into it.  Unfortunately for me, that period didn't last nearly long enough.

The way this paddle hits is just not that pleasant when it's more than a light whack.  Now, I know, not all spankings are meant to be pleasant, but all of you who get thwacked with stuff out there know that there's a difference between a good hurt and a bad hurt, and the harder whacks with this paddle were all bad hurt to me.  Too sharp, not enough weight behind the impact, and the vast difference between one blow and another just had me all over the place. I was getting antsy and agitated and I couldn't find a place to concentrate.  I found myself digging my fingernails into my hands as hard as I could just to give myself something steady to concentrate on.

Almost an hour later, my hands still hurt (so does my bottom, though) and my palms are still bearing the marks.  Good thing I don't do the long acrylics any more or I'm sure I would have drawn blood.  Now, I say this because I think a good deal of the responsibility for this lies with the tool itself.  I've never had this kind of feeling during a spanking before, and have had many many many over the ten years we've been together.  I've never felt this need to inflict pain on myself just to distract myself from what's going on; usually I'm losing myself in the sensation and concentrating only on what's going on.   I'm not usually a complainer about toys, but whew... this one really disappointed.

Does it sting?  Oh yeah, it lives up to it's name.  My rear end is still suffering.  And the after-glow part isn't as bad as the spanking itself was.  I like that ache that lasts for a long time, and I hope this one does as well, so that I get something out of it.  I'm told that the Masterly one got to hear noises out of me he'd never heard before, so there's something unique too. The problem was that they were yells of rage, which generally isn't what we're after.   Ironically, even though I wasn't restrained, there wasn't any crawling away, or even trying to cover myself with my hands.  Why?  The thing was a bastard enough where he meant to hit me with it, I didn't trust moving to improve the situation any.  It felt like the tool was out of control in some ways, so I felt like I needed to be in control to compensate.  Which of course is another reason I never reached that bliss-space which is so much fun to be in.

Overall, while this might work as a light warm-up toy, or might be okay for very light players who don't use anything other than a very casual, very mild hit with a paddle, it's not the thing to use for a serious spanking.  I guess this is one of those situations where you get what you pay for!  It's cheap, but I'd rather bring out the wooden spatula any day.  This made me desperately miss our old ping-pong paddle of yore.