Review Thursday: Flat Head Wooden Spatula

It's amazing what you can find when you get in the mindset of looking for something kinky that you're going to use to beat your s-type with.  Actually I can't claim the credit for this one though - she found it, and showed it to me, but I think when she smacked herself with it to test the sting it kind of scared her because the look on her face was priceless.  She immediately tried to put it back - of course I couldn't let that one slide, and it ended up in the cart.  What did we find?

A lightweight flat sided wooden spatula.  Now I know it doesn't look like much, but I liked the feel of it and flicking it around with my wrist I could get good movement with only a bit of effort. Cool.  I gave myself a few good whacks on the thigh with it to see how it worked out - through clothing it wasn't so bad, decently thuddy, but still a little stingy.

I knew it scared her a bit (and she likes that) so I've been dropping hints that we'd get to a deadline (review Thursday) and see how the spatula actually worked out.  The look on her face tided me over until the day actually came to get down to business.

I had her bend over the ottoman with her bottom in the air, perfect position.  I let her keep her pants and underwear on to get started with.  I wanted to get an idea of how much damage it did through clothing before I started using it on her bare skin.  It isn't that I can't be sadistic, its that I like to know what kind of pain shes going through so I know how to use it to best advantage.

I started in with a good rythm, mostly using my wrist, keeping up a steady but light tapping.  There was still a slightly sharp sound, but it 'felt' more thuddy on my end, like there was a heavy impact.  I tried a few harder smacks and the noise sure amped up, though she gave me the impression that even then it wasn't 'painful' in a bad way.  Now I never got in to like a full arm stroke, just a bit more flick to the wrist.

After a while when she was still wiggling and pushing her ass up at me I decided to get a bit more personal.  I pulled down her pants and underwear to see where we were at.  Her rear was a soft red - so even through clothing I think eventually I could give her a nice red glow.  I let her feel the wood on her bare skin for a moment before getting back in a rythm.  Again I was delicate at first and slowly added to the crack.

To me it felt sharper, the impact less thuddy and more bouncy.  Which usually means it's stinging the skin and not causing a deeper pain.  I noticed pretty quickly that hitting the same spot a few times in a row caused a sharper pain for her.  When we discussed it later she said the pain built very quickly, so hitting the same point repeatedly quickly became almost unbearable.

About half way through I had an idea to turn the spatula around and use the handle end.  It is about an inch and a half wide and flat like the spatula end.  Holding the wide end between my thumb and forefinger I used just the motion of my fingers moving back and forth to flick the handle end.  It turned into a rapid staccato that I actually had a very fine control of the force over.  This also gave the benefit of being able to hit straight across her bottom instead of having to focus on one spot or one cheek with the flat spatula end.

I worked my way down her thighs as well with this end.  From the way she was wiggling I don't think this was particularly painful, but gave her more sensation rather than sting.  Though there were a few points that made her jump, I think they were just particularly painful.

I moved back to the wide end to finish the job, and kept up until she was sobbing and trying to protect herself with her feet.  I usually let her wiggle and struggle around a bit, since I find it entertaining, but her feet started getting in the way of my stroke.  I also enjoy a bit of bastinado so I gave them the handle end and they quickly discovered they couldn't hide eachother at the same time and retreated elsewhere.

After the play session she didn't want to get up, and even pulling up her clothing brought a small hiss - job well done.

Later after she'd had time to enjoy sitting around both on my knee and on the couch with her freshly worked over bottom I had her stretch out across the bed and worked on the other end (her breasts).

I was more delicate on them, they're more sensitive and I unfortunately don't have anything to secure her arms with any longer.  It's on my list of priority objects to purchase.

Here the spatula actually worked better than most other toys I've tried.  The surface area was large enough to get the impact across, but not too large that I couldn't control where the sting was being placed.  I could also avoid her nipples unless I was specifically after them (she really jumps when they're included in impact play, so this worked well).

I also tried the handle end again here, and the rapid tapping on her nipples sent her squirming all over the bed - not much more you can ask for from that.  At one point I had her holding her breasts up for me while I rapped at her nipples - it was hot and something I will definately do again.

Overall - Definately a bargain toy, I think it was $5 at Canadian Tire and I'm sure we'll get a lot of enjoyment out of it.  Likely less as a paddle alternative and more as a breast and nipple torture device.  The light weight lends itself perfectly to prolonged use, in fact she was tired out long before I was.  Some days after a spanking my wrist and arm are a bit sore, but I didn't feel any aftereffects at all this time.

Read Her View for more information

Review Thursday: The Wooden Spatula

The Masterly one and I were wandering through Canadian Tire and stopped in the kitchen goods aisle to pick up a new can opener.  Hanging along the racks were buckets of wooden kitchen implements, including a wooden spatula, which looked fairly similar to a small-ish wooden paddle.

I picked it up, twirled it in my fingers and swished it in the air.  He grinned.

I slapped it against my palm.  Wow, did it sting.  I'm not sure exactly what my face looked like, but his was suddenly full of that dark hunger that speaks of evil things he wants to do to me.  I hurriedly slid the spatula back into it's home.

He looked disappointed.  I felt bad.  I plucked out the spatula again.  He grinned.  I cowered.  I handed it to him, and he tucked it into the cart.

I got scared.

After our somewhat failed experiment with the leather gloves, I knew more spanking implements were in order. Spanking is a favourite in our house.  Really, I don't know why it isn't a favourite in every house...

Last night I was ordered onto my knees on the ottoman.  Face down, on my elbows with my back arched and my bottom presented, I waited.  It didn't take long.

Through my pants and panties, the spanking started out bare-handed, but soon progressed to the wooden spatula.  There was definitely more of a sting there than there was with his hand, a sharper edge, but the blows were lightweight and didn't start out painfully.  It was more of an interesting, sharp sensation.

After a time, the pants and panties were pulled down.  What is it about starting out clothed that makes the removal part way through a spanking so much more humbling than starting out naked?  I suppose when you start out unclothed you have a chance to get your "I feel sexy" mood going, whereas when you're already feeling vulnerable and maybe a little scared it's a bit humiliating and scary.

My bottom was stinging, but not too badly.  Now, the blows began against bare skin, and it was immediately different.  I absolutely loved the series of quick, lighter blows that started, heating one area before moving on.  I later found out these were made with the handle, not the "head" of the spatula, which is about the dimensions of a wood ruler.  Oh love love love... it heated up my rear, the blows building on each other pretty quickly.  It made me squirmy and overheated.  I had tears in my eyes and was sniffling, but wasn't in severe pain.

No, that started when he flipped the spatula around and started using the "head" of it to make hard, more widely spaced blows.  Holy crap.

This was less thuddy than a paddle and had a really severe sting to it.  The blows build on one another pretty quickly this way, so that when he went back and hit an area a second time too quickly it was severely painful.  It didn't take him overly long before I was sobbing desperately and had dropped from my knees primarily to try to use my feet to shield my bottom.  If you don't know how this works, it involves bending your knees to get your feet right up there in the way.  As a reward, my feet started getting beaten, at which point I was so busy trying to protect my feet that I almost forgot about my bottom.  Not quite, though, as it got a bit more attention.

In the aftermath, my bottom was overheated, and having my pants and panties pulled back up made my skin scream with the sensation of it.  Oh, how it stung, and ached, and was hot.  I wanted to remain on my belly on the ottoman, but was ordered onto Master's lap.  I really really didn't want to sit on my bottom just then and did my best to convince him that I should get to stay on the ottoman.  When he started whacking with the spatula again, I became much more obedient (ow-ow-ow-ow-ow).  His lap wasn't fun.  That concentrated sitting on just one leg?  Yeah, it made the heat and the ache so much worse.

The ache was pretty severe through bedtime, at which point I was laid across the bed on my back, head hanging off the edge so that Master could use his new spanking toy on my breasts while he was properly serviced.  Wow.

I am sure he was using lighter blows here, because usually my instinct to cover up my breasts is really strong, as much as I like the evil things he does to me, and it was less urgent here.  Of course, having a distraction like keeping him satisfied helped too.  Most paddles are too big, they make too much of an impact on my breasts and just get me upset rather than worked up.  Not so with this item.  While the blows were stingy, and usually I prefer thuddy impact play, they were just right.  I wanted to cry when he rubbed it over me after the hits, because it felt incredibly cool against my hot flesh.  The smacks on my nipples also made me want to cry, in a slightly different way, but the build-up of sensation was remarkable.  I was almost overwhelmed, and when he had me hold up my breasts in offering, it was a moment of pure control; so difficult to present myself for torment, and to bear the sensations that made me want to both run away and be fucked until demolished.

Today, the ache in my bottom is minimal, enough there to remind me what happened, make me slightly sensitive and uncomfortable, but not so much as to make life difficult.  In my breasts, it's mostly the same... aching and hungry for more sensation.  This toy is definitely a keeper.  I suspect Master thinks so, too.

Read His View for more information

Review: Chopstick Clamps

For a while my girl has been asking me to try chopstick nipple toys on her. I'm not sure when or why it started, but it has been tickling in the back of my brain for a while.  Until the other day when she brought it up by showing me some hot pictures and I finally agreed to give it a shot.  We're a bit short on toys at the moment and anything relatively inexpensive that we can play with is a big bonus.  She was more anxious than I had thought, since that night I was given a pair of chopstick clamps preconfigured and ready to be used.  Well - I wasn't 'given' them, they were quickly placed on my nightstand before she quickly scurried away on her way to bed.  When I asked what they were she blushed and said something like 'new toys' - which was very cute, as usual.

I took a look at them to get an idea of how to use the effectively.  My fingers are dexterous, but are thick and wide so manipulating delicate objects sometimes takes me some practice.  These seemed pretty straight forward.  Pry open, place over nipple, release.  We have two different kinds of chopsticks in the house, so I got one of each types.  One type is a bit of a rougher and more squared wood, the others are perfectly smooth and round.  I played with the elastics wrapped around the ends until I thought they gave the right amount of pressure for a first attempt.

So a short time later after some fun play I snagged the pair of them, her nipples were at attention and it was a good chance to see how these actually worked.  Now I'm used to having a bit of a learning curb with new items, but I really had some trouble with these.  Mostly I had a hard time pulling them far enough apart to slip easily over her nipple.  She has quite large nipples, and while I could wedge my thumb into the chopsticks it wasn't quite enough.  Eventually I had to get my thumb and forefinger between the chopsticks and pinch her nipple, then kind of drag it through.  Now, that was interesting, and it worked - she didn't seem to mind - but it took a while and I felt clumsy.

For the second one I decided to try a different approach. I took the elastic off one end so they were easier to spread apart, then clamped them over her nipple.  I started trying to wrap the elastic around the ends again, but they kept twisting out of my grip and pinching her nipple a little more sharply than I had intended.  Which made her jump around and usually made me lose the grip on her nipple.  When I eventually got the elastic tight enough to hold it was impossible for me to go that extra twist or two and make it acutally tight.  So this whole idea was a bust.

Properly clamped nipple

I ended up taking them back off and redoing the elastics, then jamming my thumbs into them until they were wide enough and getting them properly over her nipple.  I think after some more practice things would go smoother, though I don't think I'd try it if I had to use one had to steady her breast, like if she was in an upright position, hanging face down or laying down are probably optimal.  The secret is to get a thumb or finger to the right and left of where the nipple will be and wedge the center open far enough that it slides down easily, then removing your thumbs without letting the chopsticks ride up.

Now for the fun part - I've never had clamps this wide on her nipples, so the first idea I had was to spin them like clock hands (no not quick like winding something).  So I took one end and pushed it down, maybe to 6 O'clock (Originally I had the ends horizontal at 3 and 9).  I could see the nipple twisting inside of them, so they seemed to be working as intended.  Twisting more elicited more reaction, probably something like a pinch and twist, but I could keep twisting and wasn't limited by the rotation of my wrist - bonus.  A see-sawing motion didn't seem to produce much effect, I started to pull on them, but they weren't tight enough not to slip.  So I pushed the elastics more toward the center and they held on quite well.  I'm not sure how much change in pressure there was to her, but it seemed noticeable on my end that they were more firmly attached.  I also found I could squeeze them even tighter by adding pressure with my fingers on either side of her nipple for a bit of extra tightness.

With the chopsticks being so large almost any movement made them bounce a bit, which usually created more movement - another bonus.  It's always nice when toys do some of the work, especially since I only have two hands.  I didn't leave them on for super long, since this was our first play session with them, but they seemed to have pretty much the same effect that any other type of compression clamp does.

Overall - Decent idea, once they were on they worked well.  I had trouble getting them properly placed, but I assume that is just neophytism and with practice it wouldn't be an issue - the technique isn't difficult.  It's always nice to find a pervertable that isn't super expensive, chopsticks are quite cheap and easy to find.  I would recommend sticking to laquered good quality chopsticks, both because the elastics will slide on them (I didn't have trouble in that area) and because getting splinters in my fingers would suck.  I've seen pictures of those takeout chopsticks that are connected at one end used, so it is possible - completely up to personal preference.

Read Her View for more information

Review Thursday: Chopstick Clamps

Chopsticks make kind of an amazing pervertable.  I'd heard about chopstick clamps a long time ago, but it's something we've never tried.  To be honest, before our house fire, we relied primarily on store bought items rather than pervertables.  We had quite a sizable toy chest, but when everything burned... everything burned.  It's pricey to rebuild a toy collection, and since I'm not earning the kind of money that I once did, perverting ordinary objects into BDSM toys has become a new fascination.

Quarter shown for scale

In order to create chopstick clamps, all you need is four chopsticks, and four elastics.  Lay out the chopsticks with one small end to each larger end, as the photo shows. I would highly recommend using coated hair elastics rather than rubber bands for this, as they are easier to slide along the length of the chopstick.

You can tighten the pressure by the number of times you wrap the elastic around the chopsticks, making them infinitely adjustable, depending on the elastic and the chopsticks.  You can also adjust the feel of the compression by sliding the bands closer to the center, and hair elastics slide very smoothly, to create a slowly building pressure instead of jerky, sudden tugging sensations. Of course, some sadistic types might prefer this kind of sensation, so experiment and see what you prefer.

So, what do they feel like?

Well, to a certain extent, clamps are clamps.  The rounded nature of chopsticks do create a slightly different pressure than other clamping devices we've used.  We tried two different types that we had in the house, and both were lacquered.  I would not recommend using unfinished, throwaway chopsticks for this by the by, because you definitely don't want to get splinters in your nipples.  Head to Chinatown, where you can pick up a finished set of eight for a song.  They are also widely available on the Internet.

One of the sets we used was a more rounded type, while the other was slightly more squared (though not to a sharp-edged degree.  The rounded set seemed to have more pressure to them, though that could have been just the snugness of the rubber bands, since the chopsticks were also slightly larger.  The difference isn't noticeable just looking at them; it took holding them up to one another to discern that the circumference was just slightly different.

What makes these interesting and fun, is that when they're played with, they create some really amazing and unique sensations.  Rolling them back and forth, for example, creates an amazing sensation similar to rolling the nipple with fingers, but with a much sharper edge to the sensation.  Tugging also creates somewhat of a different pressure than most other nipple clamps.  It reminded me of a set of round, pressure clamps we had before the fire (sorry, I can't remember the name!) with flat plates that came together, but even there the sensation was still somewhat variable, because with the chopsticks you can tug on only one side or press them into the breast tissue, which also creates a different feel.

These are definitely a fun, unique pervertable which will be staying in our toy box permanently now!

Read His View for more information